Thursday, September 30, 2010


I'm wondering how much you are missing me right now.  Or if you have even thought about me today.  I have no idea how you and I have gotten to this point.  When did it go from being so passionate about each other to thinking about giving it all up?  I don't understand why love is not enough.  It should be enough; it should sustain two people during the times when everything else seems around them has become difficult and out of reach. 

I can still remember the first time that we met; I have NEVER been so nervous in my life, scared that I was about to meet my future; the man that God had created for me to love the rest of the days of my life.  I remember seeing you in Chicago at my brother's wedding.  It was like a dream when you were standing there in front of me; that was the very moment I knew I loved you. 

My feelings for you have not wavered but somehow our relationship has. There is no easy way around it now.  I am begging God for answers; but only hear the noises of grasshoppers outside my window.  They offer me nothing more than a quick distraction from all the thoughts running through my head.  I can't stop the constant of drops coming from my eyes any more than I can stop the leaves from changing colors in the Fall. 

I know that God has a plan for my life; He has a plan for your life; but what plans does He have for us together?

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Need You Now.

" Now, this is all that I am; here with my outstretched hands.  Cause I really need you. I know that I need you now."  --Addison Road, "Need You Now"

I sit here.  Weak. Defeated. Brokenhearted. Scared. Alone.

I don't understand You.  I don't know what You want me to do.  So I sit here in silence. I hardly know what to say to You.  I do know that You understand my tears; You understand my heart. 

You have NEVER failed me before.  I need You.  Now. 

Even when I feel this way, I have never felt more loved by You.