day one of thankfulness.

Day One of Thankfulness:

I am THANKFUL to be back in school, pursuing my dream to not only teach, but to love and care, and make a difference in the lives of children.  I did not get into this profession because I absolutely love the idea of children learning; granted, it's amazing to see that 'light bulb' moment. The real reason that I want to be a teacher is because it has chosen me.  It was decided a long time ago that my heart would yearn to show love to those that needed it in their most vulnerable times, but also in their most triumphant times as well.  It was decided a long time ago that I would want to show those who think they can't, that they can.  It was decided a long time ago that I wanted to make a difference, even if it was just to one person.  And then that's when I decided that I wanted to leave the world better than I left it.

Despite the long nights and bags under my eyes, not knowing if I'll actually see the light and giving up any and all fun, I am THANKFUL that I am back in school. 

Teaching Post

I've had a blog for awhile now, that has been dormant for some time now; so it is nice to put it to use again. : )  I think that a blog can be very useful for a classroom and hope to implement one when I become a teacher. 
I always thought I wanted to be a middle school Special Education teacher, but my feelings and thoughts have changed.  I am leaning towards 1st or 2nd grade, still in Special Education, however, my thoughts still might change as I continue in this program.  I love anything that has to do with history or cultures.  I have always loved traveling and learning about the history and culture.
I've known from an early age that I wanted to be a teacher, especially a Special Education teacher.  My mother has been a para my entire life, and I've been around people with disabilities since I was born, and knew that I wanted to teach people with disabilities.

sunset.

I wanna run away with you at sunset.....

hospital.

I'm sitting here in the hospital as sounds of the KU game echo in the background; I look at my dear friend laying in the bed and whose hand I have been holding much of the day.  Every so often he wakes up and put his arms out as a way of telling me that he wants a hug.  As I bend down to give him one, he whispers "I love you."

You see, this dear friend that I talking about it not like you and I.  In fact, there hasn't been a day in his life that he hasn't seen adversity; strange looks; suffering and challenges.  He is incredibly special.  And I feel lucky to know him.

He has his own family, but they have very little interest in his life.  To him, those of us sitting around his hospital bed are his family.  If you could see us now you wouldn't think we looked anything alike, but if you looked much deeper than that, you would realize that we do.

I have always known that my life would be spent helping people like my dear friend find a better way of life; a sense of meaning in this world the rejects them; and love; but it has never been more clear than today they are, in fact, helping me.

fight another day.

Even when your heart's been broken
He'll be there with His arms wide open.
Be strong and His love will lead you to fight another day.
--Addison Road

one of those days.

They say that time can heal anything, but I wonder how much time they are talking about.  Nothing has gotten easier; if anything, time has made everything more real and more painful.  I'm starting to wonder if this old adage holds any truth to it.  Does time really heal anything?  Or do we just get used to the fact that things are never going to be the same?  Will the pain really go away?  I have found no comfort in time. It hasn't told me that everything is going to be okay.  It hasn't handed me a tissue when I'm crying.  It hasn't promised me that tomorrow the pain will be gone.  If anything, it has slowed down to the point that I find myself begging the clock to turn to the next minute.  Time has not shown me it's mercy.  Yet.

Despite all of this, and my willingness to forgive Father Time, I know that I will be okay. Eventually time will be my friend again, but until then, it's just 'One Of Those Days.'

i. love. fall.

everything i love about fall....

pumpkin spice latte. pumpkin pie. pumpkin bread.  pumpkin muffins.  pumpkins.  sleeping with my windows open.  snuggling under the covers.  jogging with a long sleeve t-shirt.  sweaters.  leggings.  cool, crisp mornings.  bath and body works leaves candle.  colors of the changing leaves.  falling leaves.  apple ciders.  caramel apples.  thanksgiving.  october.  the farmers market.  bond fires.  extra blankets on the bed.  homemade soups.  red, orange, yellow, brown. wearing my slippers around the house.  walking my dog.